What an awesome weekend we have had at the She Speaks Conference with Proverbs 31 Ministries. We spent four full days together planning, learning, and dreaming about what is in store for Living Well Ministry! 

During this time we were encouraged about where we are as a ministry and regarding those of you who follow us. We are grateful for those of you who read our blogs, our book, comment, talk to others about us, love and pray for us on this journey. 

We were challenged to be "wise women" of the Word and in our actions, to tie our identity to Christ and keep Him the main focus of it all, and to ask and expect God to use us in mighty ways to reach others for His Glory. 

We are excited about the future of Living Well and where we feel God is directing us toward. We are beginning our next book project "I Love My Man." Many of you have heard this message. The book will have more details, stories, and discussion questions for study purposes. 

We are looking forward to events in the future where we get to share the Gospel, love on other women, and see them grow in the knowledge of Jesus. Isn't that what it's all about? That all men and women come to the saving knowledge of Jesus? 

We are asking the Lord for more opportunity in the coming months. If you are (or your church is) looking for speakers for your next event we would love for you to consider Living Well. We are called to bring challenge, speak encouragement, and offer Hope to others.....we would be count it a privilege to get to do this with your friends and families.  

Finally, our picture is with Lysa TerKeurst (President of Proverbs 31 Ministries). She shared with us this weekend and inspired us to be women who draw others straight to Jesus. That is our prayer for Living Well. If you would, please pray for both of us and Living Well - we are honored that you would do so. 

Live Well, 
Tracie and Elizabeth 

The past few weeks, my husband and I have had the privilege to love on our two adult kids as they have come to us for council. I'm so grateful they feel they can come and share their thoughts, anger, frustrations, and regrets with a desire to know what we might have to say about their situation.

I want to encourage you young moms and dads out there to build a good track record of communication with your kids. I found this was imperative in getting them through their teen years. From the very beginning it was a priority in my mind to have good relationships with my children. I knew not to be their "friend" as they were growing up, Lord knows they needed a mom, not another friend. But I also knew there was going to be a time in their life when I did want to be their friend. That time is now. 

They are both living for the Lord, which has everything to do with Jesus and His grace, not with me and Sean. This is the greatest joy of my heart to see them following Him and making decisions based on His Word. And although we are traveling that pathway to friendship, they still need the council of their parents. We are blessed, blessed and blessed that they are comfortable coming to us. I want this for every parent....because there is such joy and contentment when your adult kid comes asking for prayer and your advice. 

How do you prepare for this season of your child's life? Here are a couple of things we did in our home to build a foundation of trust and good communication between us and our kids:

• We tried to be good listeners. Our kids knew they had a voice in our home. We wanted them to feel a part of a "team" and that meant they could voice their feelings. We required the voice to be respectful in tone and attitude and in the end they knew we had the final word. But having the respect from us that their voice mattered was important.
• We asked a lot of questions. We were interested in their thoughts, feelings and desires. We talked a lot in our home. Sometimes the conversations were hard, sometimes they were lighthearted, but we talked to one another. It made a difference. 
• We prayed with them. Out loud. Every time they had an issue, we prayed. They knew God was the answer. They both are comfortable praying out loud and with others...this makes for a good relationship when you can pray with one another.
• We made sure our kids knew they could come to us with ANYTHING. The good, the bad and the ugly. ANYTHING. Nothing was off limits and we tried very hard not to freak out and lose control when they came, no matter how shocking or disappointed we were. After all....we made some pretty awful mistakes when we were young!

The Lord is our ONLY hope to have a great relationship with our adult kids. It takes, like so many things in this life, great intention.  Sometimes you can do everything right and they choose not to be relatable, this is heartbreaking, but God is powerful...keep praying for that relationship to be restored. 

If you don't have a good relationship with your kids, start doing things today to change it. If you are a controlling parent, back off. Begin to say your are sorry when you mess up, give your kids permission to have a voice, be kind and use kindness and patience in your tone of voice with them. It will take awhile for them to trust and see your relationship differently, but give it time. God is there to help in a huge way....

Have a great weekend!
In Him,
Elizabeth

Why am I so focused on the here and now....the "stuff" of this life....the "things" that our culture has deemed important? Why have I bought into the idea that success is defined by the things we have achieved, the titles we have, the house, the cars, that kids successes etc...? Can you relate? Do you sometimes feel the burn of the desire or need to succeed? 

Many of you know my mother is currently in hospice and facing the end of her journey here on this earth. This season in her life has made me reevaluate many things....mostly, "What is this life of mine spent on?" My mother has modeled a focused life; but not one that this world would necessarily say is focused on the "right stuff." She has always been focused on serving others, thinking of others above herself, selflessly giving to those around her, encouraging others in their walk, prayer that intercedes, and loving her Lord etc. She realized something early on that has taken me years to realize.....this life is temporary....this is not her home and she is eagerly anticipating Heaven. 

Jennie Allen of the book Anything wrote, "If we believe this life is temporary; that belief alone changes how we live it." Hmmm, does my life look like I believe this life is temporary? Do I operate with the reality that my life is a vapor and EVERY day should be spent sharing the amazing news about our eternal home? Does my life invite others to check out the Jesus that I proclaim to love? Do I eagerly anticipate, daily, being in the presence of my savior? I am trying.

The word encourages us to keep an eternity focus.....every day.....with every interaction....to anticipate the next life with excitement and anticipation. If we do, it will totally change how we live each day.....preparing for my next home with my King! 

I hope you will take a few moments each day this week to meditate on these verses, on the Lord, spending eternity with Him, and worshiping who He is in your life! 

James 14:14 "How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone."

John 10:28 "I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one can snatch them away from me"

Psalm 39:4-7 "Show me, Lord, my life’s end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Everyone is but a breath, even those who seem secure. Surely everyone goes around like a mere phantom; in vain they rush about, heaping up wealth
without knowing whose it will finally be. But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you.


Live Well,
Tracie 

A couple of weeks ago, we had a reader ask us to share our thoughts on how to guard our kiddos from the onslaught of sexual imagery that our culture is constantly shoving into our faces. So, here are some thoughts on the subject. 

It is imperative to keep our kid's innocence intact for as long as possible. This is so difficult to accomplish in our culture. We will only succeed if we have an intentional game plan. These days having the "birds and the bees" discussion is happening before kids are in the 2nd grade.....this is ridiculous. Think about it...almost every Disney movie has a "love" story in it. You can't walk in the mall without being accosted by photos of half naked women in the Victoria Secret windows. I hear mothers asking their little ones, "is that your girlfriend?", thinking it's so cute to speak to those feelings of attraction at such an early age. Are you getting my thinking here? 

I know I sound like I am on a soapbox, and perhaps I am. I feel pretty passionate about this subject matter because I see how rampant our culture is tearing away at the value of sex. It has absolutely taken the beauty and meaning out of it.  It has stripped sex of modesty. You cannot find a sitcom on T.V. that doesn't have sex outside the boundaries of marriage in it. It's pitiful. To the world, it is weird to wait until marriage to have sex. We have to help our kids be ok with being weird....it won't be easy. 

If we desire our kids to have a Godly perspective on sex, we better be ready to talk about it and set very clear boundaries of what is allowed in our home and what is not. I know a young mom who doesn't allow her kids to watch any Disney movies because she doesn't want to stir up the God given desire to be loved by the opposite sex at such an early age. How wise is that? I wish I had been as discerning as a young mom! 

Here are a few suggestions of what we can do to protect our kids and begin to set boundaries in this crucial area of parenting:

• Eliminate most T.V./Movies from their life. (I know, brutal.) Don't trust ABC Family or Nick Jr. to have kid/pre-teen appropriate material. Most of the stuff on those channels could be described as teen soaps. 
• When you encounter soft porn (Victoria Secret, magazines at the check out), teach your kids to turn from it. Teach them, especially your boys, to begin to learn to bounce their eyes from sexual images. 
• When your boys are old enough (12 or so), buy the book "Every Young Man's Battle" and encourage your husband to read through it with your son and talk about it. If you are single, ask a male family member or do it yourself. 
• Teach your girls to be modest. Require them to dress modestly. Teach them to honor the young men in their life by not wearing tight, form fitting clothes that make it very difficult for young men to stay pure in their thoughts. 
• Teach your girls how to act in front of young men. To respect them and not be flirtatious. 
• Teach your boys that their job is to treat young women with enormous respect and honor.
• Don't talk/ tease them about their friendships with the opposite sex. Treat the friendship as what it should be.....simply friendship. When we say things like " Oh, is she your girlfriend?" or "Is that your boyfriend?" we may be doing it very innocently, but what is does is puts the idea in their head that it's time for them to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. When it's not even close to being that time in their lives. 
• Make sure your kids know they can ask you anything...then get ready....cause they will!

Bottom line....your child's heart is what's important. We can try to keep the crud of the culture out of our home, but our kids live in this world and we can't protect them from everything we would like. So, we work very hard to protect what they are exposed to and we concentrate a lot on their relationship with God and with us. We pray that their hearts will beat after the things of God and they will desire Him above all else. And we establish trusting, communicative relationships with them from the beginning. 

 We also place value on the beautiful act of sexual intercourse between a man and his wife and we let our kids know this has been God's plan since the beginning of time. The culture has changed and folks have flowed right along with it, but we must instill the truth that God never changes....He is the same yesterday, today and forever. 

Ask for God's help to know the best way to keep your kids innocent in their thoughts and their knowledge of sexual things. As always, remember, God loves your child more than you do and He is there to protect them as He helps them to walk in His plan in this very important area of their life. 

In Him,
Elizabeth

Summer is always a time of reflection, reorganization, and recommitment for me. Since I work in a school district I am blessed to spend most of my summer as I please. Every year I am tired and feel the need to do this but especially this year, with many challenges in our family/health, I have needed this time to recalibrate or reboot. If you are a bit weary from the past months; I hope these ideas/suggestions will help.

I tend to be fairly systematic about my reboot starting with my spiritual growth, habits, and outlook, then examine my relationships, and then my physical (personal and spaces in the house) habits/changes. Once I have made a list about "where I am today," I begin to ask the Lord to show me where I need to reorganize my priorities or change areas in my life. Funny, He always answers this prayer! Some years the nudging of the Holy Spirit is harder to submit too but every time I do; He is faithful to come alongside me and give me strength to accomplish the goal.

Here are a few things that I am reading or revisiting this summer to assist in the reboot:

Spiritual: The book "Anything: the prayer that unlocked my God and my Soul" by Jennie Allen.  In this book Jennie challenges me to really evaluate what I am willing to do to fully live for Jesus...to be sold out....to follow Him no matter what He asks me to do.

Marriage: The book "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs and the book "For Women Only" by Shaunti Feldhahn. These books remind me about our differences and what I can do as a wife to fully love My Man! I need these reminders.....continually, in order to do this in a Godly manner! 

    Side note about marriage: Elizabeth and I have started to work on our next project and the book will be "I Love My Man"! We can't wait to share the information God has given us about loving our men fully. We will keep you posted on the progress!

Parenting: The book "God's Heart for Your Home: Creating a Place of Everyday Ministry." This book is written by Elizabeth and me. I ALWAYS need reminders about how to parent in a way that draws my children to Jesus! I love the short chapters and I go back every time to the reflection questions. It takes repetition of these truths in order to consistently implement what we wrote!!

Organization (physical spaces): For this area, I take inventory about my spaces in my home - what needs cleaning out and organized. I make a "to-do" list and get going.

Physical (body): I try to find a 5K run or some race/cause to support and I ramp up the amount of exercise I get since I have more time.

What do you do to "reboot" when you are tired and run down? Are you doing any summer reading? If so, share your thoughts and ideas! 


Blessings to you for a recharge in your walk with Jesus, relationships with your man and children and clearing of your mind and spaces!! 


Live Well, 
Tracie 

The other morning in my quiet time, I got a scolding from the Holy Spirit. Has that ever happened to you? Thank goodness He is not like an old time school teacher that takes a ruler to your outstretched hand. No...God is gentle and kind. Firm, but loving. He doesn't dance around the point but gets right to it. You don't sit wondering what He is trying to get you to see. He makes it clear. 

You might be wondering what I needed to be scolded about. Well, it was about a complaining heart and spirit. Six weeks ago we moved into an amazing house. I love this old house. It's cool. It's very eclectic and interesting. But it is in need of some decorative changes. We have been doing some major work in the kitchen and I haven't been able to unpack my boxes yet. I have been living out of a little make-shift kitchen in my mud room. Six weeks ago, this was an adventure.....now.....not so much. 

During my quiet time, I was reading my Voice of the Martyrs magazine. It was all about the country of Sudan and what Christians are experiencing there. Persecution. Hardship. Prison. Hunger. Threat of murder. The pictures and stories were tough to see and read. As I finished reading and praying for these precious brothers and sisters in Christ it happened....my scolding. 

God reminded me of a few recent conversations. In them I had said things like, "I'm so done with this remodel. It's beginning to affect my life. I'm not so sure how much longer I can take living out of a make-shift kitchen." As I sat there with these reminders, I felt ashamed of myself. I could imagine the woman in one of the pictures in the magazine, who is living in a make-shift house, made of sticks and tarp, and the landscape is a refugee camp asking..."what is she complaining about....her place looks like heaven!"

What in the world do I have to complain about? So what if my kitchen is torn apart and boxes are everywhere. So what! Does it really matter? No! All my response should be to my life right now is "Thank You Lord for this amazing, fun house You have blessed us with!" Period. Finito. That's all folks. 

After a time of repentance and getting my mind and heart right with the Lord, I determined my whole entire attitude would change. Life actually is easier now. I feel lighter and happier. Nothing has changed as far as my circumstances.....things are still a mess....but my heart is content. My Scripture this week to put to memory is I Thessalonians 5:16-18...

"Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."  (NIV)

Please learn from my mistake and let your heart be full of contentment and gratefulness today....no matter what you are going through, God is still in control and He is still good and worthy of praise!

In Him,
Elizabeth