Like a good girl, I had gone for my yearly checkup with my doctor as well as my yearly mammogram. A few days later, I got a contact from my Dr. saying they had seen something on my mammogram and wanted to do further testing. Further testing. Any woman who has had a mammogram knows, this is not what you want to hear. I called and made an appointment for a more detailed mammogram for a week later.
As soon as I hung up the phone I was acutely aware of it. The door. And someone was knocking. LOUDLY. This door appeared outside my heart and mind. I knew almost immediately who was knocking so abnoxiously....his name was fear. I was so connected to the fact that if I opened that door up, even a tiny crack, he would barge in, knock me down, and completly take over my heart and mind.
All week he knocked on that door. All week I resisted going and opening it up. Giving him entry. At times, I was overwhelmed by the need to open the door. But God was so close, reminding me He has not given me a spirit of fear, but of love, power and a sound mind. (II Tim. 1:7) I didn't tell anyone about the door until later...I had this feeling that talking about it would give that spirit of fear the attention it craved. And I wanted him to feel ignored and unimportant and steal his pride and arrogance away from him.
I went for my appointment and everything turned out to be fine. Thank you Jesus. But as I pondered about what I had experienced all week, I became very grateful for the lesson learned. It made me ask myself... how many times do I go open the door? How many times have I ignored the prompting of the Lord to not open the door to fear, anger, pride, jealousey, gluttony or some other ungodly spirit knocking on the door trying to disconnect me from my Father.
I hope talking about my mammogram has not been "too much information"....but I felt compelled to share about the door and encourage you to be aware of who is knocking at the door of your heart and mind. Before answering....pray and listen. I promise He will answer and give you the strength to keep the door shut and the enemy out!